1
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<i>Previously on
Bob Hearts Abishola...</i>

2
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You are going to Nigeria
this summer.

3
00:00:05,440 --> 00:00:07,007
I am?

4
00:00:07,050 --> 00:00:09,835
You will behave and represent
this family well.

5
00:00:09,879 --> 00:00:11,707
You will also call me
every day.

6
00:00:11,750 --> 00:00:13,143
Of course.

7
00:00:13,187 --> 00:00:15,667
Before the plane takes off,
after it lands,

8
00:00:15,711 --> 00:00:19,236
before, during and after
every car trip.

9
00:00:19,280 --> 00:00:20,629
Yes, Mum.

10
00:00:22,065 --> 00:00:23,501
It does not matter
how things are

11
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with your father and me.

12
00:00:24,807 --> 00:00:26,504
This trip will be
good for you.

13
00:00:26,548 --> 00:00:28,419
That is what matters.

14
00:00:28,463 --> 00:00:29,594
Thank you, Mum.

15
00:00:29,638 --> 00:00:32,032
And I will never be against you.

16
00:00:32,075 --> 00:00:33,903
Okay, Mama.

17
00:00:39,561 --> 00:00:40,823
Be safe.

18
00:00:42,825 --> 00:00:44,392
Yes, Mum.

19
00:00:45,741 --> 00:00:46,742
And, Dele...

20
00:00:48,483 --> 00:00:51,225
...I will be watching
everything you do.

21
00:00:56,665 --> 00:00:58,275
Hello, Mum.

22
00:00:58,319 --> 00:00:59,711
[gasps] You look skinny.

23
00:00:59,755 --> 00:01:01,713
-I'm fine.
-Are you sure?

24
00:01:01,757 --> 00:01:04,542
Tell Granny to make you
eba and okra stew.

25
00:01:04,586 --> 00:01:07,067
You'll be nice and chubby
by the weekend.

26
00:01:07,110 --> 00:01:08,807
I haven't seen Granny yet.

27
00:01:08,851 --> 00:01:10,548
Weren't you supposed
to see her yesterday?

28
00:01:10,592 --> 00:01:11,723
Dad got us tickets
to a football match.

29
00:01:11,767 --> 00:01:13,203
Uh, Gran didn't mind.

30
00:01:13,247 --> 00:01:15,205
Was she smiling
when she said that?

31
00:01:15,249 --> 00:01:18,556
Because if she was,
that means she does mind.

32
00:01:18,600 --> 00:01:20,471
No, I can't right now.
I'm talking to my mum.

33
00:01:20,515 --> 00:01:21,733
Who's that?

34
00:01:21,777 --> 00:01:22,734
Oh, that's Bola.

35
00:01:22,778 --> 00:01:23,735
Who is Bola?

36
00:01:23,779 --> 00:01:25,737
-My sister.
-Oh.

37
00:01:25,781 --> 00:01:28,305
-Do you want to say hi?
-No.

38
00:01:28,349 --> 00:01:31,308
Oh, is that Dele?
Yes.

39
00:01:31,352 --> 00:01:33,441
Look how skinny he is.

40
00:01:35,182 --> 00:01:37,009
Before he left, we should
have fattened him up

41
00:01:37,053 --> 00:01:38,620
like a Christmas goose.

42
00:01:38,663 --> 00:01:40,143
UNCLE TUNDE:
Dele,

43
00:01:40,187 --> 00:01:41,927
this is Morenike.

44
00:01:41,971 --> 00:01:43,842
She will be renting your room
while you are gone.

45
00:01:43,886 --> 00:01:45,670
What?

46
00:01:45,714 --> 00:01:47,455
-Hello, Morenike.
-Hello, Dele.

47
00:01:47,498 --> 00:01:49,631
Hello, Morenike.
Excuse us.

48
00:01:50,719 --> 00:01:52,416
Why did you not
tell me this?

49
00:01:52,460 --> 00:01:55,419
I'm sorry, when did this
become your apartment?

50
00:01:55,463 --> 00:01:58,770
I know you are sad
at Dele being gone,

51
00:01:58,814 --> 00:02:00,816
but you can be happy
knowing that his room

52
00:02:00,859 --> 00:02:03,819
is not sitting empty,
gobbling money.

53
00:02:04,733 --> 00:02:06,691
["Ifanla" by Sola Akingbola
playing]

54
00:02:30,062 --> 00:02:32,369
-Ah, good morning.
-Hey, good morning.

55
00:02:32,413 --> 00:02:34,066
I thought you'd have left
for work already.

56
00:02:34,110 --> 00:02:35,285
Oh, you're right.

57
00:02:35,329 --> 00:02:37,548
I'm late. Better call my boss.

58
00:02:37,592 --> 00:02:40,203
Hey, Bob, is it okay if I hang
out with Abishola for a minute?

59
00:02:40,247 --> 00:02:41,813
[chuckles] Very funny.

60
00:02:41,857 --> 00:02:44,076
Do you mind?
I'm on the phone with my boss.

61
00:02:44,120 --> 00:02:45,904
[chuckles]

62
00:02:45,948 --> 00:02:47,297
I should get your mother's
workout ready.

63
00:02:47,341 --> 00:02:49,647
Actually, she just left.
What?

64
00:02:49,691 --> 00:02:50,735
She and Christina
went to Mom's house

65
00:02:50,779 --> 00:02:51,997
to take care of some stuff.

66
00:02:52,041 --> 00:02:53,564
[sighs] Why didn't you call me?

67
00:02:53,608 --> 00:02:54,913
I just found out myself.

68
00:02:54,957 --> 00:02:56,654
When will they be back?

69
00:02:56,698 --> 00:02:57,742
Not until later.

70
00:02:57,786 --> 00:02:59,483
So what am I supposed to do,

71
00:02:59,527 --> 00:03:01,311
be paid to sit around
and do nothing?

72
00:03:01,355 --> 00:03:03,661
It's the American dream.

73
00:03:03,705 --> 00:03:05,837
You know I cannot do that.

74
00:03:05,881 --> 00:03:07,709
First there's a stranger
in Dele's room,

75
00:03:07,752 --> 00:03:09,319
and now you have ruined
my whole day.

76
00:03:09,363 --> 00:03:10,755
Wait, who's in Dele's room?

77
00:03:10,799 --> 00:03:13,193
Auntie and Uncle rented it
out to a cousin.

78
00:03:13,236 --> 00:03:14,585
What? You didn't tell me that.

79
00:03:14,629 --> 00:03:17,327
[mocking]:
I just found out myself.

80
00:03:17,371 --> 00:03:20,417
Look, I'm sorry things
got screwed up.

81
00:03:20,461 --> 00:03:21,853
But if you want,
I could call my boss

82
00:03:21,897 --> 00:03:24,204
and see if I could
take the day off.

83
00:03:24,247 --> 00:03:25,770
Don't be ridiculous.

84
00:03:25,814 --> 00:03:28,904
There's no reason for
the both of us to be useless.

85
00:03:34,910 --> 00:03:36,564
[grunting]

86
00:03:36,607 --> 00:03:38,522
You got this, Christina.

87
00:03:38,566 --> 00:03:40,959
Almost there. You can do it.

88
00:03:41,003 --> 00:03:43,092
[both grunting]

89
00:03:45,834 --> 00:03:48,184
Mission accomplished.

90
00:03:50,186 --> 00:03:52,623
-Now, was that so hard?
-Yeah.

91
00:03:52,667 --> 00:03:54,886
It was very hard.

92
00:03:54,930 --> 00:03:57,237
Yeah, well, try carrying
the whole family on your back.

93
00:03:57,280 --> 00:03:59,064
See how that feels.

94
00:03:59,108 --> 00:04:01,632
Listen, will you get me
that blue box in the closet?

95
00:04:01,676 --> 00:04:03,286
It's on the top shelf.

96
00:04:03,330 --> 00:04:06,246
You made me carry you up
an entire flight of stairs

97
00:04:06,289 --> 00:04:07,899
to grab you a box?

98
00:04:07,943 --> 00:04:10,162
Couldn't I have just
brought it down to you?

99
00:04:10,206 --> 00:04:13,253
Hindsight's 20/20, sweetie.

100
00:04:16,299 --> 00:04:18,432
[sighs]:
Oh, boy.

101
00:04:18,475 --> 00:04:20,608
It's, um, been a while, huh?

102
00:04:21,870 --> 00:04:24,176
Yep.

103
00:04:24,220 --> 00:04:28,746
I guess the last time
you were here was P.S.

104
00:04:28,790 --> 00:04:30,182
P.S.?

105
00:04:30,226 --> 00:04:33,142
Oh... pre-stroke.

106
00:04:34,970 --> 00:04:36,493
Cute.

107
00:04:36,537 --> 00:04:39,322
I bet you miss
this place.

108
00:04:39,366 --> 00:04:40,932
Oh, it's just a house.

109
00:04:40,976 --> 00:04:43,848
Yeah, but it's
your house.

110
00:04:43,892 --> 00:04:46,286
Not for long.

111
00:04:46,329 --> 00:04:48,940
Oh, come on, Mom.

112
00:04:48,984 --> 00:04:51,769
I don't think God's in any rush
to get you to heaven. [chuckles]

113
00:04:51,813 --> 00:04:54,598
I'm not dying.
I'm selling the place.

114
00:04:54,642 --> 00:04:56,165
What?

115
00:04:57,166 --> 00:04:59,777
You-you can't just
sell the house.

116
00:04:59,821 --> 00:05:02,432
Now, don't get
all Christina on me.

117
00:05:02,476 --> 00:05:04,347
But this is our family home.

118
00:05:04,391 --> 00:05:07,829
We should discuss this
as a family.

119
00:05:08,917 --> 00:05:10,179
Pass.

120
00:05:12,529 --> 00:05:13,661
Okay.

121
00:05:14,662 --> 00:05:17,795
I think I know where
this is coming from.

122
00:05:17,839 --> 00:05:21,451
There have been a lot of
changes this past year,

123
00:05:21,495 --> 00:05:24,889
a lot of stuff that you
can't do anything about,

124
00:05:24,933 --> 00:05:28,893
so you want to have control
over this one thing.

125
00:05:30,852 --> 00:05:33,985
You know, for someone so young,
you're very insightful.

126
00:05:34,029 --> 00:05:36,248
Thank you.

127
00:05:40,427 --> 00:05:42,037
[chuckles]

128
00:05:46,258 --> 00:05:49,087
It is a wonderful place
that has anything

129
00:05:49,131 --> 00:05:51,916
you could possibly need
for your daily life.

130
00:05:51,960 --> 00:05:53,091
What is it called again?

131
00:05:53,135 --> 00:05:54,354
Costco.

132
00:05:54,397 --> 00:05:55,355
Yes.

133
00:05:55,398 --> 00:05:56,921
We will take you.

134
00:05:56,965 --> 00:06:00,925
The first time can be
an overwhelming experience.

135
00:06:00,969 --> 00:06:02,405
Thank you for letting me
stay here.

136
00:06:02,449 --> 00:06:04,189
And giving me
this guidance.

137
00:06:04,233 --> 00:06:06,104
Ah, much like Costco,

138
00:06:06,148 --> 00:06:08,933
-we have wisdom in bulk.
-Mm.

139
00:06:08,977 --> 00:06:12,502
I love this American stew.
What is it called?

140
00:06:12,546 --> 00:06:15,723
It is not American.
This is ogbono.

141
00:06:17,159 --> 00:06:19,944
Oh. Well, whatever it is,

142
00:06:19,988 --> 00:06:21,250
it is wonderful.

143
00:06:23,470 --> 00:06:25,733
Perhaps I should make you
something else?

144
00:06:26,560 --> 00:06:28,431
Oh, no, Auntie.

145
00:06:28,475 --> 00:06:31,521
I just need to get used to
America's more subdued flavors.

146
00:06:31,565 --> 00:06:33,480
Subdued?

147
00:06:34,568 --> 00:06:36,396
I think it is very smart
you have

148
00:06:36,439 --> 00:06:38,398
immersed yourself
in the culture,

149
00:06:38,441 --> 00:06:42,967
with the mild food,
the American decorations.

150
00:06:43,925 --> 00:06:45,143
Even your accents.

151
00:06:45,187 --> 00:06:46,797
What is wrong with our accents?

152
00:06:46,841 --> 00:06:48,233
Oh, nothing.

153
00:06:48,277 --> 00:06:50,148
I love the way
you say "ogbono."

154
00:06:50,192 --> 00:06:51,454
Ogbono.

155
00:06:51,498 --> 00:06:53,282
Mm-mm. Ogbono.

156
00:06:54,370 --> 00:06:56,720
-Ogbono.
-Ogbono.

157
00:06:56,764 --> 00:07:00,332
Og-bo-no!

158
00:07:00,376 --> 00:07:02,465
Never mind.

159
00:07:02,509 --> 00:07:04,249
Just pass the fufu.

160
00:07:04,293 --> 00:07:06,643
Fufu. Ah.

161
00:07:06,687 --> 00:07:09,298
I just love
your American accents.

162
00:07:13,607 --> 00:07:16,610
[speaking Yoruba tensely]

163
00:07:23,399 --> 00:07:24,792
Hello?

164
00:07:25,793 --> 00:07:27,011
The wife?

165
00:07:27,055 --> 00:07:28,273
Yes.

166
00:07:28,317 --> 00:07:29,710
She hang up on you?

167
00:07:30,711 --> 00:07:32,364
Yes.

168
00:07:32,408 --> 00:07:35,280
You know, before
I dated Abishola,

169
00:07:35,324 --> 00:07:37,457
I would've said call her
right back, but now...

170
00:07:37,500 --> 00:07:38,849
You have to let them stew.

171
00:07:38,893 --> 00:07:41,112
You have to let 'em stew.

172
00:07:41,156 --> 00:07:43,593
Like a tough cut of beef.

173
00:07:43,637 --> 00:07:46,466
Doesn't ignoring them
just make them angrier?

174
00:07:46,509 --> 00:07:47,771
That would be impossible.

175
00:07:47,815 --> 00:07:49,381
Nigerian women
start out furious

176
00:07:49,425 --> 00:07:50,992
and make their way down to,

177
00:07:51,035 --> 00:07:53,168
"I will not kill you
in your sleep."

178
00:07:54,169 --> 00:07:56,606
Yeah, the trick is to
diffuse the situation

179
00:07:56,650 --> 00:07:58,303
before she has
a chance to get mad.

180
00:07:58,347 --> 00:07:59,783
How do you do that?

181
00:07:59,827 --> 00:08:01,132
Yeah, that's the piece
of the puzzle

182
00:08:01,176 --> 00:08:02,873
I haven't figured out yet.

183
00:08:02,917 --> 00:08:04,135
Oh, I love puzzles.

184
00:08:04,179 --> 00:08:06,224
You're kidding. Me, too.

185
00:08:06,268 --> 00:08:08,400
I recently finished
a breathtaking one

186
00:08:08,444 --> 00:08:09,532
of marine life.

187
00:08:09,576 --> 00:08:11,708
Ah, that's a lot of blue.

188
00:08:11,752 --> 00:08:13,797
I started with
the objects: coral,

189
00:08:13,841 --> 00:08:16,321
clown fish,
the diver's flippers.

190
00:08:16,365 --> 00:08:17,975
Smart.
[chuckles]

191
00:08:18,019 --> 00:08:19,237
What?

192
00:08:19,281 --> 00:08:21,370
You two need girlfriends.

193
00:08:23,285 --> 00:08:25,722
They could help
with the puzzles.

194
00:08:25,766 --> 00:08:27,637
[chuckles]:
Yeah.

195
00:08:27,681 --> 00:08:30,466
Oh, my God,
we do need girlfriends.

196
00:08:33,295 --> 00:08:36,820
I did a surprise Taco Tuesday
on a Thursday.

197
00:08:36,864 --> 00:08:38,909
Ooh, girl,
you're out of control.

198
00:08:38,953 --> 00:08:41,259
-Abishola.
-Hello.

199
00:08:41,303 --> 00:08:43,174
What are you doing here?
You don't have work today.

200
00:08:43,218 --> 00:08:45,350
I was not needed at Bob's house,

201
00:08:45,394 --> 00:08:48,266
so I came by to see if I could
pick up some extra hours.

202
00:08:48,310 --> 00:08:50,268
Wait, you had
the day off from work,

203
00:08:50,312 --> 00:08:53,010
so you came to work
to ask for more work?

204
00:08:53,054 --> 00:08:54,534
Yes.

205
00:08:54,577 --> 00:08:56,187
This is a hospital.

206
00:08:56,231 --> 00:08:58,581
You come here
if you're being paid or dying.

207
00:08:58,625 --> 00:09:00,365
Leave this place immediately.

208
00:09:00,409 --> 00:09:02,019
Go.

209
00:09:02,063 --> 00:09:04,587
I'm just not good
at being worthless.

210
00:09:04,631 --> 00:09:06,241
How do the two of you do it?

211
00:09:07,416 --> 00:09:10,462
[scoffs] Well, first of all,
don't call it worthless.

212
00:09:10,506 --> 00:09:14,292
And second, I go to a museum
or a ball game.

213
00:09:14,336 --> 00:09:16,904
Gloria and I sometimes
go to the jazz club.

214
00:09:16,947 --> 00:09:18,601
Mm!

215
00:09:18,645 --> 00:09:21,038
Yeah, we get all dressed up,
have a couple of cocktails.

216
00:09:21,082 --> 00:09:23,301
-It's fun.
-Good worthless fun.

217
00:09:23,345 --> 00:09:24,955
Fine, I'll go with you tonight.

218
00:09:24,999 --> 00:09:26,957
Tonight?

219
00:09:27,001 --> 00:09:29,481
Oh, I-I would have to
-change some things around.
-Okay.

220
00:09:29,525 --> 00:09:31,092
Change those things. What time?

221
00:09:32,528 --> 00:09:34,008
What do you think?

222
00:09:36,184 --> 00:09:37,881
Aw, what the hell.

223
00:09:37,925 --> 00:09:40,405
Let's keep this crazy
Taco Thursday train running.

224
00:09:40,449 --> 00:09:41,972
But if you do this,

225
00:09:42,016 --> 00:09:44,409
you will have to adhere
to some rules.

226
00:09:44,453 --> 00:09:45,976
I like rules.

227
00:09:46,020 --> 00:09:48,936
First off, we know
the music's loud.

228
00:09:48,979 --> 00:09:50,415
-Don't keep saying it.
-Okay.

229
00:09:50,459 --> 00:09:51,982
And don't count
how many drinks I've had.

230
00:09:52,026 --> 00:09:53,418
I already know it's too many.

231
00:09:53,462 --> 00:09:55,246
Okay.

232
00:09:55,290 --> 00:09:57,988
And don't be one of those women
that flirts with the musicians.

233
00:09:58,032 --> 00:10:00,164
That's my thing.

234
00:10:00,208 --> 00:10:02,906
And don't play air instruments
along with the band.

235
00:10:02,950 --> 00:10:04,691
That's my thing.

236
00:10:06,040 --> 00:10:08,912
Oh... wait.

237
00:10:08,956 --> 00:10:11,175
You can't throw these away.

238
00:10:11,219 --> 00:10:14,265
These are my first
ballet slippers.

239
00:10:14,309 --> 00:10:15,832
Are you gonna cry
at every piece of junk

240
00:10:15,876 --> 00:10:17,834
we take out of these boxes?

241
00:10:17,878 --> 00:10:19,444
No.

242
00:10:19,488 --> 00:10:22,012
Oh...

243
00:10:22,056 --> 00:10:23,274
Christina.

244
00:10:23,318 --> 00:10:25,102
Well, I don't understand.

245
00:10:25,146 --> 00:10:26,669
You're feeling better.

246
00:10:26,713 --> 00:10:28,932
You can move back in soon.

247
00:10:28,976 --> 00:10:32,283
Why can't you just stay
here till you die?

248
00:10:32,327 --> 00:10:33,937
Because I'll be alone.

249
00:10:33,981 --> 00:10:35,635
By the time you kids
figure out I'm dead,

250
00:10:35,678 --> 00:10:38,202
I'll already be haunting
the next family.

251
00:10:38,246 --> 00:10:40,683
We-We'll hire a
cleaning lady.

252
00:10:40,727 --> 00:10:43,033
She'll find the body.

253
00:10:43,077 --> 00:10:45,775
All I'm saying is,
none of you came around P.S.

254
00:10:45,819 --> 00:10:47,472
P.S.?

255
00:10:47,516 --> 00:10:49,779
"Pre-stroke."
It's <i>your</i> stupid term.

256
00:10:49,823 --> 00:10:51,781
We saw you all the time.

257
00:10:51,825 --> 00:10:54,654
At work.
Because you were paid to.

258
00:10:54,697 --> 00:10:59,702
And it was a job that came
with benefits: seeing you.

259
00:10:59,746 --> 00:11:01,878
Knock it off.

260
00:11:01,922 --> 00:11:04,228
All of you left this house
the minute you could

261
00:11:04,272 --> 00:11:06,143
and you never looked back.

262
00:11:06,187 --> 00:11:07,579
Now it's my turn.

263
00:11:07,623 --> 00:11:10,670
Okay, I get it.
You were lonely.

264
00:11:12,715 --> 00:11:15,152
But what if I moved
back in here with you?

265
00:11:15,196 --> 00:11:17,198
You'd do that?

266
00:11:18,199 --> 00:11:19,374
No.

267
00:11:24,292 --> 00:11:27,687
Wow. If we weren't
already engaged,

268
00:11:27,730 --> 00:11:30,167
I'd say you were
out of my league.

269
00:11:30,211 --> 00:11:32,256
-You can still say it.
-Hey, stand there.

270
00:11:32,300 --> 00:11:33,344
Let me take your picture.

271
00:11:33,388 --> 00:11:35,433
Uh, you know what?

272
00:11:35,477 --> 00:11:36,739
I don't like the lighting.
Move over there.

273
00:11:36,783 --> 00:11:39,350
Bob.
I'm just excited.

274
00:11:39,394 --> 00:11:41,744
You're going out with the girls.
You never go out with the girls.

275
00:11:41,788 --> 00:11:43,703
[camera clicks][doorbell rings]

276
00:11:43,746 --> 00:11:46,053
They're here. It's happening.

277
00:11:49,056 --> 00:11:50,405
[door opens]
BOB:
Hey!

278
00:11:50,448 --> 00:11:52,102
[overlapping greetings]

279
00:11:52,146 --> 00:11:53,364
BOB:
Wow, you ladies
look wonderful.

280
00:11:53,408 --> 00:11:55,279
-GLORIA: Thank you.
-Wait, smile.

281
00:11:55,323 --> 00:11:57,717
BOB:
Uh, I don't like the
lighting. Move over there.

282
00:11:57,760 --> 00:11:59,762
Bob, let them in.

283
00:12:03,418 --> 00:12:05,463
Ah... Oh, look at you.

284
00:12:05,507 --> 00:12:06,638
Look at <i>you.</i>

285
00:12:06,682 --> 00:12:07,944
Look at us.

286
00:12:07,988 --> 00:12:09,859
GLORIA:
Oh.

287
00:12:09,903 --> 00:12:12,906
Boom. Can I get you ladies
anything before you go? Wine?

288
00:12:12,949 --> 00:12:14,298
Beer? Mixed drink?

289
00:12:14,342 --> 00:12:15,778
I don't think we
have time for that.

290
00:12:15,822 --> 00:12:17,388
Do you have champagne?

291
00:12:17,432 --> 00:12:19,042
-I can rustle up some bubbles.
-Mmm.

292
00:12:19,086 --> 00:12:20,565
I'll have a glass.

293
00:12:20,609 --> 00:12:22,263
We should get going.
We don't want to be late

294
00:12:22,306 --> 00:12:24,134
for our worthless night out.

295
00:12:24,178 --> 00:12:26,136
Wrong. We don't
want to be early.

296
00:12:26,180 --> 00:12:27,877
The only people who show
up to the club early

297
00:12:27,921 --> 00:12:30,488
are tourists and prostitutes.

298
00:12:30,532 --> 00:12:33,709
And you certainly
aren't... tourists.

299
00:12:34,797 --> 00:12:37,408
Sorry, just excited.

300
00:12:37,452 --> 00:12:38,975
-Well, this is nice.
-Mm-hmm.

301
00:12:39,019 --> 00:12:41,108
All we need now
is some music.

302
00:12:41,151 --> 00:12:43,153
Hold, please.

303
00:12:43,197 --> 00:12:46,940
["Ladies' Night"
by Kool and the Gang playing]
All right, Sock Man.

304
00:12:46,983 --> 00:12:49,899
[laughter]
Mmm.

305
00:12:49,943 --> 00:12:52,989
Bob, I can always count
on you for the good stuff.

306
00:12:53,033 --> 00:12:54,425
Only the best for
my gal's pals.

307
00:12:54,469 --> 00:12:55,905
Seriously, make
yourselves at home

308
00:12:55,949 --> 00:12:57,777
and hang out for as
long as you want.

309
00:12:57,820 --> 00:13:00,605
Are you sure about that?

310
00:13:00,649 --> 00:13:03,434
<i>Una</i> margarita for <i>la señorita.</i>

311
00:13:03,478 --> 00:13:04,522
<i>Gracias.</i>

312
00:13:04,566 --> 00:13:06,089
Our house Cabernet.

313
00:13:06,133 --> 00:13:07,438
Thank you, dear.

314
00:13:07,482 --> 00:13:08,439
And an old fashioned.

315
00:13:08,483 --> 00:13:09,789
Thank you, Sock Man.

316
00:13:09,832 --> 00:13:12,008
-Bob, this is so sweet.
-No problem.

317
00:13:12,052 --> 00:13:13,183
No, I am telling you
it is too sweet.

318
00:13:13,227 --> 00:13:14,402
Make it again.

319
00:13:22,149 --> 00:13:23,715
[laughter]
Okay, okay.

320
00:13:23,759 --> 00:13:27,545
Famous Bobs. Marley.

321
00:13:27,589 --> 00:13:28,024
Uh, Newhart.

322
00:13:28,068 --> 00:13:29,199
Wheeler.

323
00:13:29,243 --> 00:13:30,853
[imitates buzzer sound]

324
00:13:30,897 --> 00:13:32,202
Bob Wheeler is a nobody.

325
00:13:32,246 --> 00:13:33,464
-Drink!
-Drink!

326
00:13:33,508 --> 00:13:35,815
He is my nobody.

327
00:13:35,858 --> 00:13:37,207
Oh.
[laughs]

328
00:13:37,251 --> 00:13:38,730
Mm-mm.

329
00:13:38,774 --> 00:13:40,384
-Next category.Mm-hmm.
-Mm-hmm.

330
00:13:40,428 --> 00:13:42,691
Nigerian students
who were accepted

331
00:13:42,734 --> 00:13:45,172
into every Ivy League school.

332
00:13:45,215 --> 00:13:46,826
Harold Ekeh.

333
00:13:48,001 --> 00:13:50,960
Oludamilola Oluwadara Adekeye.

334
00:13:51,004 --> 00:13:53,571
Oh, come on, y'all.

335
00:13:53,615 --> 00:13:54,964
-Drink!
-Drink!

336
00:13:55,008 --> 00:13:56,226
[laughs]

337
00:13:56,270 --> 00:13:57,880
This is so much fun.

338
00:13:57,924 --> 00:14:00,883
Yeah. It's nice to see you
cut loose for once.

339
00:14:00,927 --> 00:14:02,580
-KEMI:
-You may not
believe me,

340
00:14:02,624 --> 00:14:04,756
but Abishola used to be
the life of the party.

341
00:14:04,800 --> 00:14:06,236
-I don't believe you.
-Mm-hmm.

342
00:14:06,280 --> 00:14:07,672
KEMI:
Old Abishola
told jokes,

343
00:14:07,716 --> 00:14:10,850
sang, she was
a beautiful dancer.

344
00:14:10,893 --> 00:14:11,851
What?

345
00:14:11,894 --> 00:14:13,200
But she died a slow,

346
00:14:13,243 --> 00:14:15,898
boring death
many, many years ago.

347
00:14:15,942 --> 00:14:17,595
When I had Dele,

348
00:14:17,639 --> 00:14:19,684
Tayo and I were already
struggling to get by.

349
00:14:19,728 --> 00:14:20,729
Then Tayo left

350
00:14:20,772 --> 00:14:21,861
and I didn't have time

351
00:14:21,904 --> 00:14:23,340
for foolish things anymore.

352
00:14:23,384 --> 00:14:25,081
Sometime life just gets
in the way, huh?

353
00:14:25,125 --> 00:14:27,040
[jazz music playing]

354
00:14:27,083 --> 00:14:28,606
Ooh! I love this song.

355
00:14:28,650 --> 00:14:30,913
[imitates strumming bass]

356
00:14:30,957 --> 00:14:32,393
Oh, here we go.

357
00:14:38,312 --> 00:14:40,053
[coughing, sputtering]

358
00:14:40,967 --> 00:14:43,099
What is wrong?

359
00:14:43,143 --> 00:14:46,276
I-I had some of the food
that Morenike brought.

360
00:14:46,320 --> 00:14:48,539
I have one word for it.

361
00:14:48,583 --> 00:14:50,063
[screams]

362
00:14:51,760 --> 00:14:53,196
It's not you.

363
00:14:53,240 --> 00:14:55,938
The girl has the
devil's taste buds.

364
00:14:55,982 --> 00:14:57,287
It was so embarrassing, uh,

365
00:14:57,331 --> 00:14:59,942
sweating and crying
in front of her.

366
00:14:59,986 --> 00:15:02,118
You have nothing to be
embarrassed about.

367
00:15:02,162 --> 00:15:05,382
We spent more time in Nigeria
than she has been alive.

368
00:15:05,426 --> 00:15:07,471
I marched for my country's
independence.

369
00:15:07,515 --> 00:15:09,386
And I was almost Miss Lagos.

370
00:15:09,430 --> 00:15:11,258
Well, if the water
commissioner's daughter

371
00:15:11,301 --> 00:15:12,912
had not entered,
you would have won.

372
00:15:12,955 --> 00:15:15,436
If I'd known his bribe
was going to be that big,

373
00:15:15,479 --> 00:15:17,090
I would not have
learned to juggle.

374
00:15:18,091 --> 00:15:20,136
Nigeria is in our bones.

375
00:15:20,180 --> 00:15:23,313
Uh, no matter how we speak,
h-how we eat,

376
00:15:23,357 --> 00:15:25,228
or how much time spent away.

377
00:15:25,272 --> 00:15:28,231
Nothing can change
what is in our hearts.

378
00:15:28,275 --> 00:15:29,841
Nothing.

379
00:15:29,885 --> 00:15:32,322
Tunde, look at the time.

380
00:15:32,366 --> 00:15:34,063
Oh, <i>The Masked Singer</i> is on.

381
00:15:34,107 --> 00:15:35,760
Oh, I'll make the Jiffy Pop.[laughs]

382
00:15:35,804 --> 00:15:38,111
Who do you think
they will unmask tonight?

383
00:15:38,154 --> 00:15:39,677
The giant pelican.

384
00:15:39,721 --> 00:15:42,942
And I am convinced
it is Macaulay Culkin.

385
00:15:45,031 --> 00:15:47,033
What has happened to me?

386
00:15:48,034 --> 00:15:50,079
I know the star of <i>Home Alone,</i>

387
00:15:50,123 --> 00:15:53,822
yet I cannot pronounce "ogbono."

388
00:16:00,220 --> 00:16:02,004
Ogbono.

389
00:16:06,922 --> 00:16:08,010
How's the fried rice?

390
00:16:08,054 --> 00:16:09,316
Pretty good.

391
00:16:11,144 --> 00:16:13,494
I know you don't think
I was the best mother.

392
00:16:18,499 --> 00:16:21,023
Wow.

393
00:16:21,067 --> 00:16:23,199
No. I... I just thought
there was more.

394
00:16:23,243 --> 00:16:26,202
There is, but I thought
there would be some protest.

395
00:16:26,246 --> 00:16:27,987
Just to be polite.

396
00:16:29,162 --> 00:16:30,990
You are the best mother.

397
00:16:31,033 --> 00:16:34,167
You're lying,
but it's still nice to hear.

398
00:16:36,343 --> 00:16:37,822
You know, it's been
kind of great

399
00:16:37,866 --> 00:16:39,215
spending so much time
with you kids

400
00:16:39,259 --> 00:16:40,564
while I've been at Bob's.

401
00:16:40,608 --> 00:16:42,479
It has been.

402
00:16:42,523 --> 00:16:44,046
In a weird way,
I feel like the stroke

403
00:16:44,090 --> 00:16:46,048
has given me a second chance.

404
00:16:46,092 --> 00:16:48,007
It's given all of us
a second chance.

405
00:16:49,269 --> 00:16:53,403
And for the record, you
weren't so horrible.

406
00:16:53,447 --> 00:16:56,015
Go back to lying.

407
00:16:56,058 --> 00:16:59,018
No, I mean, you didn't bake
cookies or check my homework,

408
00:16:59,061 --> 00:17:02,847
and you kind of missed a lot
of what my therapist called

409
00:17:02,891 --> 00:17:05,111
"significant milestones."

410
00:17:06,112 --> 00:17:07,983
Bring it home, will you?

411
00:17:09,376 --> 00:17:12,857
But after Dad died,
I saw you pull yourself together

412
00:17:12,901 --> 00:17:16,078
and get up and go back
to MaxDot.

413
00:17:16,122 --> 00:17:18,950
I really didn't have
much choice.

414
00:17:18,994 --> 00:17:20,604
You did.

415
00:17:20,648 --> 00:17:23,955
You could have broken down
and curled up in a ball.

416
00:17:23,999 --> 00:17:27,394
But you ran
the business.

417
00:17:27,437 --> 00:17:28,960
You kept us afloat.

418
00:17:29,004 --> 00:17:31,093
Thank you, honey.

419
00:17:31,137 --> 00:17:32,790
You know,

420
00:17:32,834 --> 00:17:35,271
the few things I
like about myself,

421
00:17:35,315 --> 00:17:37,273
I get from you.

422
00:17:37,317 --> 00:17:40,624
You know, your strength,
your work ethic.

423
00:17:40,668 --> 00:17:41,886
You never take no
for an answer.

424
00:17:41,930 --> 00:17:44,063
Hmm. Neither do you.

425
00:17:44,106 --> 00:17:46,326
Yeah. And I have the
restraining orders to prove it.

426
00:17:47,849 --> 00:17:50,286
GLORIA: <i>
Ooh, that's my jam.</i>

427
00:17:50,330 --> 00:17:52,419
All right, get up, y'all. Let me
see if y'all know this dance.

428
00:17:52,462 --> 00:17:53,985
Abishola doesn't dance.

429
00:17:54,029 --> 00:17:57,815
Normally that is true,
but I have been drinking.

430
00:17:57,859 --> 00:18:01,210
[laughs] Come on, y'all, help me
move this table out the way.

431
00:18:01,254 --> 00:18:03,952
Come on, come on,
push, push, push.

432
00:18:03,995 --> 00:18:06,607
All right, y'all.
We gonna do the Detroit Hustle.

433
00:18:06,650 --> 00:18:09,262
You got it? Follow me.

434
00:18:09,305 --> 00:18:11,394
Here we go. And salsa.

435
00:18:11,438 --> 00:18:13,657
And out and up and salsa.

436
00:18:13,701 --> 00:18:15,311
And toe and toe,

437
00:18:15,355 --> 00:18:17,226
and cross, cross,
cross, cross, slide.

438
00:18:17,270 --> 00:18:18,575
Cross, cross,
cross, cross, slide.

439
00:18:18,619 --> 00:18:21,012
Slow down, slow down, slow down.

440
00:18:21,056 --> 00:18:23,841
Oh, no, the liquor
has stolen my rhythm.

441
00:18:23,885 --> 00:18:25,669
[laughs]
I do not think it's the liquor.

442
00:18:25,713 --> 00:18:27,018
[laughter]

443
00:18:27,062 --> 00:18:28,846
All right,
I got mixers and snacks.

444
00:18:28,890 --> 00:18:31,240
And I had this piñata
in my garage,

445
00:18:31,284 --> 00:18:33,329
and I thought,
"I'll just bring it over."

446
00:18:33,373 --> 00:18:35,026
Great. I need you to
walk those drinks out,

447
00:18:35,070 --> 00:18:36,506
and we're 86'ed on ice.

448
00:18:36,550 --> 00:18:37,855
Copy.[phone ringing]

449
00:18:37,899 --> 00:18:39,857
Oh, oh. It's Dele, it's Dele.

450
00:18:39,901 --> 00:18:41,337
Bob, please turn down the music.

451
00:18:41,381 --> 00:18:42,686
[clears throat]

452
00:18:42,730 --> 00:18:44,340
Hello, Dele.

453
00:18:44,384 --> 00:18:45,950
[chuckles] <i>
E kaale,</i> Mum.

454
00:18:45,994 --> 00:18:47,430
Did you have a good day?

455
00:18:47,474 --> 00:18:49,258
Oh, it's, uh, it's morning here.

456
00:18:49,302 --> 00:18:51,173
[laughs]:
Oh. It is.

457
00:18:51,217 --> 00:18:53,001
When you get back,

458
00:18:53,044 --> 00:18:55,786
you have to help me learn
this dance that Gloria knows.

459
00:18:55,830 --> 00:18:57,527
You want me to help you dance?

460
00:18:57,571 --> 00:19:00,704
Ah, Dele doesn't think
I know how to dance, either.

461
00:19:00,748 --> 00:19:01,879
[laughter]

462
00:19:01,923 --> 00:19:04,143
That's because you cannot.

463
00:19:05,318 --> 00:19:06,275
Ah-ah-ah. You are laughing

464
00:19:06,319 --> 00:19:07,668
at your mother.

465
00:19:07,711 --> 00:19:09,713
No, I'm just happy
to see you happy.

466
00:19:09,757 --> 00:19:14,588
Aw. And I am happy that you
are happy that I am happy.

467
00:19:16,024 --> 00:19:17,199
Oh, I love you, Dele.

468
00:19:17,243 --> 00:19:18,200
I miss you

469
00:19:18,244 --> 00:19:20,898
very much.

470
00:19:20,942 --> 00:19:22,204
I love you, too, Mum.

471
00:19:22,248 --> 00:19:23,205
You do?

472
00:19:23,249 --> 00:19:24,989
[chuckling]:
Yes.

473
00:19:25,033 --> 00:19:28,079
Good. I love my mother,
but I do not like her.

474
00:19:28,123 --> 00:19:29,646
Do you like me?

475
00:19:29,690 --> 00:19:30,647
KEMI:
Okay, that's enough.

476
00:19:30,691 --> 00:19:32,083
Bye-bye, Dele.

477
00:19:32,127 --> 00:19:33,215
ABISHOLA:
But I want to talk to my son.

478
00:19:33,259 --> 00:19:34,695
KEMI:
I'm saving you.

479
00:19:34,738 --> 00:19:36,958
You must never tell
your children the truth.

480
00:19:41,049 --> 00:19:42,920
I'm glad Mum is having
a good time.

481
00:19:42,964 --> 00:19:44,879
Maybe too good a time.

482
00:19:44,922 --> 00:19:47,534
Another reason why you should
stay here with me.

483
00:20:00,286 --> 00:20:02,070
I hope you enjoy the soup.

484
00:20:02,113 --> 00:20:04,420
I tried to make it
less spicy for you.

485
00:20:04,464 --> 00:20:07,380
[strains]:
Yes, very mild.

486
00:20:09,295 --> 00:20:10,861
Here, have more pepper.

487
00:20:10,905 --> 00:20:12,515
Oh. No, please.

488
00:20:12,559 --> 00:20:14,604
Uh, ladies first.

489
00:20:17,259 --> 00:20:19,087
How thoughtful.

490
00:20:20,001 --> 00:20:22,743
It is so enjoyable going in.

491
00:20:22,786 --> 00:20:26,790
I'm sure it will be
just as enjoyable coming out.